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Wednesday, August 31, 2005

I miss Jay so much.

Bunny @ Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Friday, August 26, 2005


I spent my weekend with about 120 mountaineers at the 7th Infantry Division in Fort Magsaysay, Nueva Ecija.

We had 2 reasons for going there: help with the reforestation project and climb Mt. Taclang Damulag ("Cow Dung" in english. The shape of the mountain resembles cow poo daw kasi)

We arrived at Fort Magsaysay just in time to catch the sunrise

The view from our "room" last weekend.

Getting settled (Mick, Aina, me and Carlo)

The soldiers greeted us with breakfast--pandesal, boiled eggs and coffee. There was a briefing right after and then we were told to prepare for the climb to Mt. Taclang Damulag.

Trekking with Aina and Nyleve

See the highest peak? that's where we were headed

The itinerary said that the trek was going to be about 45mins only. NOT!!! A lot of us had conditioned our minds that the trek was going to be short. But an hour and a half had passed and we were still not in the summit and one of our companions (a first timer) was already suffering from an asthma attack. The trail was fairly easy but due to the lack of trees to shield us from the sun, I was seriously thinking of going back because the heat was really getting to me. I felt like I was going to collapse due to heat stroke anytime soon. 2 hours and a half later (including a hundred rest stops in between), we finally reached the peak and we were greeted by cool air and the majestic Sierra Madre mountain range. And that was more than enough to make me forget my huffing and puffing and super sweaty self.

Stopping to rest. Kahit pagod na, smile pa rin!

Soldiers watched over us all throughout the hike

That's an M-16! Woah-hooo!

When we got back to the pahingahan (thats what the place we were staying at was called), we immediately devoured our lunch and I took a quick nap to re-energize for the tree-planting activity in the afternoon.

At the planting site. Nice view, noh?

I super had to have my picture taken with these great guys. This chance doesn't come very often.

Hundreds of seedlings later and we were all very spent. An army band was setting up when we arrived from the tree-planting activity. The colonel (forgot his name) thanked everyone for going out of their way to help with the project. After dinner, the band started playing some good music, people started bopping their heads and a few of the mountaineers started to jam with the band and the exhaustion that we all felt was instantly transformed to FUN FUN FUN! Under the glistening full moon that saturday night, we sang, danced, drank, laughed, laughed some more, talked, mingled and partied like crazy. It was the perfect way to end an eventful day.


Bunny @ Friday, August 26, 2005


This site tells you who among hollywood's celebrities you look like the most. If you're bored and you have nothing to do, its so worth a shot. (Thanks Ferdz, for the link!)

Oohh la laaaa Jessica Biel!

I'm also gwapo! hahaha! Harrison Ford....yummmyyyy!

Bunny @ Friday, August 26, 2005

Wednesday, August 17, 2005


I'm really not the queen of boo-boos but I've made quite a number of flub-ups in my lifetime.

In highschool, while looking for a prom dress, I walked into a store's glass window, which of course sent the sales ladies inside laughing hysterically. Needless to say, I was beet red in embarassment that I didn't bother going inside.

While eating grilled squid with some friends many years ago, I said, "Hey the testicles are my favorite!". Of course, I meant, the tentacles.

The day after I finished fixing my chair at a company I worked for a few years back, the finance director approaches me and says, "Bunny, can I borrow the screwdriver you used yesterday?" To which I replied, "I placed it on your table after I screwed the chair." And this sent him in fits of laughter. Had to slap my forehead seconds after realizing what I had just said.

The most recent one has got to be the worst yet.

One boring afternoon last week, my co-workers and I decided to take pictures of one another. Mostly, group pictures. Decent ones naman.

The next morning, before I left home for work, I emailed the pictures to them.

That day, while my co-worker, Sol, was checking her email, she blurts, "Bunny, why did you also send the email to [name of co. president]?"


I immediately checked my sent emails folder and there it was, my big boss' email address, included in the list of people I sent the pictures to. It was then that I figured out what had happened. I was sending the email to my colleague, Roy but accidentally chose the President's name instead. Their names both start with R.

Everyone assured me that Big Boss would be cool about it, that I would be fine and that it wasn't a big deal. The pictures were decent, anyway.

But still. Embarassing. Super embarassing.

The next day, our IT Manager tells me that while talking to the President (who's out of the country right now), he says, "Ang gaganda pala ng mga girls natin sa 2nd floor noh?"

WAAAAAAAAHHH!!! *Drowning in humiliation*

Bunny @ Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Friday, August 12, 2005


I've been working from 6am to 3pm for over a month now. I do like the schedule because there's hardly any traffic going to and fro work. The only con is that I now take a cab going to work which explains the increase in my expenses.

But nevertheless, it's fine.

What really irks me are the cab drivers.

I can't even count how many times I've hailed a cab only to have the cab driver reject me and say, "Ay malayo, ayoko", "Hindi ako dadaan diyan" or "Traffic papunta dun eh"(I leave the door open and walk away when this happens. It gets a lot better if he stopped at the middle of the road. Haha!).

And then sometimes, they name the price of the fare instead of using their meters. And what's worse is they jack up the price and make silly excuses like the never-ending increase in gas prices.

I mean, isn't that the reason for the increase in cab fare prices, to compensate for the surge in fuel rates? These cab drivers and cab companies should be grateful that the government granted them that while we, puppies (Poor Urban Professionals), get salary increases as often as it rains on the Sahara.

I was running late for work this morning and there was this cab driver waiting outside his cab so I told him where I was going...

"Ma'am, 100 po ha?"

"Nyeah, ok ka lang?", was my instant reply. (Kasi naman it's only 60-70 pesos going to work)

And then he gives me this really smug look.

This ticked me off sooo badly that I said, "Alam niyo Manong, makakarma din kayo."

And he glances at me and smirks.


"Balang araw, Manong, pag may sakit kayo o yung isang kapamilya niyo, sasabihin sa inyo ng doctor o ng hospital na hindi nila kayo matutulungan kasi wala kayong pera o kulang yung pambayad niyo. Tandaan niyo yan. Makakarma ka din."

And then I immediately found another cab, hailed it and left him there--hopefully, thinking about what I said.

Bunny @ Friday, August 12, 2005

Thursday, August 11, 2005

For the past week, I've been listening to Nina Gordon's songs and among all her songs, this one hits a spot.


We're the same and you don't even know it
we're afraid and we try not to show it
and you're tired and i am too
so there's only one thing you can do

you've got to hold me and
tell me what you need
don't be afraid of what you're feeling
when you know me then
i'll never want to leave you

just hold on to me

when we're apart
i still feel together
i still believe in a thing called forever

but we're drifting apart it's true
and it's breaking my heart in two

we'll drive away
where no one can find us
it's time to leave those dark days behind us
in my dreams it's always you
so there's only one thing we can do

Other Nina Gordon songs worth listening to are "Fade to Black" (which I can kind of relate to as well), "Tonight and the rest of my life", "Now I can die" and "Said Sadly" which is a song she sang with James Iha (of Smashing Pumpkins) from when she was still with Veruca Salt.

Bunny @ Thursday, August 11, 2005

Friday, August 05, 2005


I'm happy to report that the tears have actually stopped. My tear ducts are now on strike. Overworked daw kasi. (har har)

Although I still find myself sad a lot of times, I am a happier, smiling more, person now. I am trying to get past the hurt that was the mishap that happened to Jay.

I've stopped blaming myself for not being physically there for him. I have stopped wishing that I could have done something more. I've learned to accept that Jay needs time to put himself together, to get his bearings straight. And in the process, I'm learning to understand why I didn't hear from him for so long and why he didn't tell me where he was going.

My Uncle, for the longest time, has been trying to drill in my hard, hard, head the importance of letting go and moving on. One of my bestfriends even said that I really need to move on and that it would be unfair for me to hold on when Jay is clearly in a different place. But my stubborn self keeps saying that I can't bring myself to take another step without Jay. I was convinced that I would be stuck, that I would be unmovable and that I would be nailed down to my current state until Jay returned.

The thought of never hearing from him again would be enough to let me buy a bottle of gin, some juice and chips, and drink the afternoon away, in the confinement of my room(which I actually did--was so wasted, I threw up twice. And you didn't really need to know that. Anyway...).

Because the truth is, he was so much a part of me that life made more sense when he was around. I felt like a better version of me, I liked myself more and I felt that people saw that. It was written all over my face--how extremely happy he made me.

And that's why letting go was not an option.

I have always had a problem with letting go. Of things, letters, people. A sentimental fool, yes I am. Which probably explains why I am always the dumpee in a relationship. Ask my exes and they'll tell you that on the verge of breaking up or while having a really big fight, I will always find ways to patch things up. I'm the one who says, "We will work!" or "Please, lets just try again?" and so on. I used to be a firm believer of, "Love is enough". I learned the hard way that it soo isn't. I'm so petrified of letting go that even when men cheat on me, even when they've said unjustifiable things, I forgive and try (albeit unsuccessfully) to forget.

So it goes without saying that I don't handle break-ups very well. Aside from crying buckets of tears, I have a self-destructive side (which, thankfully, I have not seen in the longest time and hopefully, I never have to see again). It takes me a while to get over people. Well, each of my relationships, no matter how screwed up some of them were, are special in their weird little ways.

For the record, Jay and I didn't break up. And thats why letting go is a tad complicated and harder than ever before. Because unlike my other relationships, I had no reason to let go--we didn't have a big fight, no one cheated on anyone, we still care for each other.

My prayers before would find me asking God to make Jay well and to bring him back to me. For the past weeks, I noticed that it has transformed to simply asking Him to make Jay well. I no longer wish him back. In fact, I've already convinced myself that he's never going to return. Now, more than anything else, I just want him to feel better about himself. I just want him to be happy. I just want him to get himself back. And I think that thats the true meaning of letting go-- its not just letting go of the person per se, it also includes releasing your desires to be with a person. Willingly, whole-heartedly, without expecting anything in exchange or in return. It's a rather selfless act. And it took a long time before I found it in my heart to accept that.

I finally heard from Jay a couple of days ago. He said that he misses me, that he hopes I'm fine, that he's sorry for putting me through this, that he was messed up and he needed to get away to recover. And that he'll talk to me soon.

In the words of Martin Luther King, "We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope."

Amen to that.

Bunny @ Friday, August 05, 2005

Thursday, August 04, 2005


I'm sorry I suggested it.

I'm sorry you paid. (sabi ko kasi, ako na eh!)

Sorry, your money went to waste.

I honestly thought it was going to be funny.

I'm sorry we had to endure the old ladies chatting behind us.

And the crazy lady laughing unreasonably loud behind the old ladies.

I'm sorry we had to see the crappy dance number.

And watch that lame excuse for a fight scene. A long one at that.

I'm sorry we were both laughing with disappointment and regret after the movie.

I promise, the next time I suggest a tagalog movie, I will make darn sure it's a good one.

I'm paying on our next movie date.
Sorry ulet.


To everyone else, please don't watch D' Anothers. It's soooo not worth it. Unless, you want to see Bella Flores in a kissing scene with Vhong Hilario and that Archie fella from Wazzup Wazzup.

Bunny @ Thursday, August 04, 2005

Monday, August 01, 2005


As that old folk song goes. And I have to tell you, it's sooo true. My back is aching more than ever and I just had a massage last Thursday!

I'm a little tamad to write about it in detail but all in all, it was a fun weekend. One of the things I love about climbing are the people (we didn't really climb this weekend, though). I only knew 3 people when we arrived at the bus terminal but 15 minutes later, everyone became a friend.(There were about 20 of us)

And we ate! sooooo much! And for the first time, I tried ginataang santol. It's basically shredded (into tiny bits) santol cooked in coconut milk with some shrimp. It was sooooo good that I bought some shredded santol and tonight, my sisters and I will have it for dinner. Hehehe!

I also got a little tipsy Saturday night and didn't realize it until I woke up with a headache Sunday morning. Anyway, here are some of the pictures:(click to enlarge)

With some of the mountaineers

Live strong. I hope you do.


I am soooo enthralled by this picture I took at around 4pm. Beautiful, right?

At the first planting site

This town needs more trees by the river so that when it rains, the trees can absorb the water to prevent it from going up the villager's homes.

That's Aina, very kulit JB and me, resting. Oh, JB is one of the Filipinos training to climb Mt. Everest in 2007.

Nung kami'y nababato, kami'y nagbabato. Hehehe! Had a hard time figuring out how to make the rocks stand.

Mystical. When I look at this picture, I feel like there's a fairy hiding in there somewhere.

I have some more pictures I want to post but I'm out of time. Maybe later today. Have a good week, everyone!

about moi

Loves the beach, wishes she had more time and money to travel, recently got hooked to climbing mountains, reads anything she can get her hands on, frustrated writer, adores her 3-year-old Lhasa Apso, Tashi, constantly needs caffeine, wonders when she'll quit smoking, and will most likely die due to liver complications from drinking too much (if the cigarettes doesn't get to her lungs first). Can't live without accessories especially big, dangling earrings, shoe freak (aren't we all?), sucker for discovering hole-in-the-wall restaurants, will ingest anything spicy, enjoys giving and receiving massages, addicted to Friends, Sex and the City and CSI, goes gaga over kids, dreams of being alone with Jim Morrison and smoking a joint with Bob Marley. Would love to party with Gwen Stefani, shop with Patricia Field, write poetry with Maya Angelou and have Sting, Nelson Mandela, Mark Twain and Bono over for dinner.

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Platform Wedge Sandals by Michael Kors
Semiprecious chain earrings by Cynthia Dugan

Semiprecious chain earrings by Cynthia Dugan
Thump by Oakley (mp3 player and shades in one!)
Thump by Oakley (mp3 player and shades in 1!)

quotable quote

"Love is not love, which alters when it alteration finds."
~William Shakespeare, Sonnet cxvi

in my book bag

I Know Why the Caged 

Bird Sings by Maya Angelou


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