My new job is taking too much of my time. I don't know shit about it as I am now with a completely different department and I am still learning the ropes. Taking this job was more difficult than I thought and the president of the company and my GM wants a lot of things done and I'm just going out of my mind because like I said earlier, I'm still learning. Anyway, I had a couple of blog entries saved on my drafts folder but never got around to finishing them coz I've been soooooo busy.
I miss you guys. :)
On top of my new job, there's also my sister's pregnancy which is driving my mom crazy. And naturally, being the eldest, I have transformed into my mother's very own sounding board. My mom wants my sister to get married. Your typical I-dont-want-my-grandchild-to-be-illegitimate kind of story. My sister, on the other hand, doesn't want to get married...at least not yet. My Uncle, my Mom, Jay and I have been debating/dicussing about this issue for weeks now. The 2 of them agree with my mother. As for me, well, let's just say I'm supporting my sister's decision to not get hitched yet.
mar·riage Pronunciation: 'mar-ij Function: noun 1 : the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a legal, consensual, and contractual relationship recognized and sanctioned by and dissolvable only by law —see also DIVORCE 2 : the ceremony containing certain legal formalities by which a marriage relationship is created
Ah...consensual.
I've seen this happen a million times to friends and acquaintances. Girl gets pregnant, parents force the couple to get married to save the family's "name" and "reputation". And admit it, a big percentage of these we-got-married-because-I-got-pregnant marriages don't really work. Know why? Because it wasn't CONSENSUAL. Fine, let's give them credit for TRYING TO MAKE IT WORK but it's not like in the U.S. where you can easily get a divorce in the event your marriage screws up. In this country, there's no divorce. Yes, you can get an annulment but the church will not grant you one just because of your irreconcilable differences. It's such a hassle and its soooo expensive to get one that most couples just get separated. And while being separated means that you're no longer together, technically, you are still married and you should still carry your husband's last name which therefore makes it impossible for you to remarry if you eventually find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.
And that's why my other sisters and I are respecting my sister's decision to not get married yet (my attempts at trying to convince my mom to support her have been futile). Because to me, marriage is a decision between 2 people in a relationship. It is not a decision that is made for them by their parents. It is not something that you force down a couple's throats. To me, marriage is something really sacred, how it all happened is a beautiful story that I want to tell my kids and my grandkids. Marriage should be not be some form of punishment for doing something you weren't exactly ready for yet. It's bad enough that they got themselves into this. You shouldn't try to cover up another mistake with another mistake.
And besides, all kids should be treated as blessings. It was my aunt who told me the other day that, "Maybe this is God's way of replacing what was lost (pertaining to my Dad, who I am so sure would have been absolutely ecstatic at the thought of being a Grandpa soon)".
You know what's sad though? Hearing my younger sisters say, "We don't want Ate Marby to get married because her marriage might end up being like Mama's and Papa's".
I don't know if "traumatized" is the word but I guess that after how many years of being a witness to how our parents couldn't stand each other, you can't really blame us for feeling this way. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm sure my parents had good times together...its just that, well, it's a little sad that they stayed together for us because I remember often wishing that they would just separate so they could both be happy. You know what I mean...
Anyhoo, I'm praying things turn out well...it should be. Hopefully, I'll get to blog more this week.
Speaking of marriages, I wanna give a big (albeit BELATED) birthday greeting to Junnie whose marriage I completely admire (Just read how he rushed back to Canada to come home to his wife in time for his birthday). I hope I find someone who will love me as much as you love your wife (I am praying that the "someone" I am talking about is Jay. Cross your fingers for me, Junnie! Hehe!)! And hopefully, we'll get to travel a lot too! Hope your birthday was a blast, Junnie (well, i'm pretty sure it was)! Thanks for 3 years of online friendship!!! *hugs*
Have a wonderful week, everyone!
Bunny @ Monday, March 14, 2005
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about moi
Loves the beach, wishes she had more time and money to travel, recently got hooked to
climbing mountains, reads anything she can get her hands on, frustrated writer, adores her
3-year-old Lhasa Apso, Tashi,
constantly needs caffeine, wonders when she'll quit smoking, and will most
likely die due to liver complications from drinking too much (if the cigarettes
doesn't get to her lungs first). Can't live without accessories especially
big, dangling earrings, shoe freak (aren't we all?), sucker for discovering
hole-in-the-wall restaurants, will ingest anything spicy, enjoys giving and receiving
massages, addicted to Friends, Sex and the City and CSI, goes gaga over kids, dreams of
being alone with Jim Morrison and smoking a joint with Bob
Marley. Would love to party with Gwen Stefani, shop with Patricia Field, write poetry with
Maya Angelou and have Sting, Nelson Mandela, Mark Twain and Bono over for
dinner.
